Pride of Life.

Their are roots to major sin in our life. The lust of the eyes, the lust of the flesh, and the pride of life. If we lust after what we see, it will eventually cause sin against flesh, we are bag full of lustful flesh. I activate in my flesh all the time, even this morning and yesterday I had been harboring bitterness towards my roomate. For correcting me on being messy, sounds stupid. But I sinned against G-D , I had bitterness against Jesus himself, and I greived the holy spirit. Knowing all of this, you can repent and turn from your wicked ways you can make things right. I made things right, apoligized... hey I do this often... very very often. Today I was going to fast, I was so discouraged with my behavior, I let condmendation creep in. Which a sin in itself, when we allow satan to push us around we abandon our sword.. God's word to counteract his attack. When stand firm on his word, we are cleansed by the blood of Jesus, we have a clean slate, we are a new creation. Satan knows if he can get you to believe in lies, that you will act out of self pity to these lies. You will hide from God, you will abandon God and his light that burns the impurities off of you. I think this is how Adam and Eve were so decieved, God all knowing knew they had sinned, and I'm guessing knew that mankind would fall short of his Glory.. and he made them anyways, isn't that great? After they had eaten from the fruit, they hid from God. Satan not only got them to fall into sin, he got them to run away from the almighty. God must have been so hurt to see and know his children chose the pride of life, instead of taking pride and confidence in their daddy. They sought their own gain , not his. They were in it for their Glory not his. How devestated he must've been, to see that they hid from him afterwards. Satan likes to feed us lies that go against the knowledge of God. We are seperated from God because of our sin, but brought back to his presence when we are cleansed by the precious blood of Jesus. We are then clean, and can boldly approach his throne. But you will never trust that fact, unless you keep your sword and fight off the condemnation that satan feeds you. If we truly knew who we were in Christ, if we truly know that we could be holy as he is holy, no matter what habitual sin we seem to fall into over and over again. If we put on the knowledge of God and reject the lies of Satan. We could operate in holiness giving Glory to the Lord. You have to first show him your filth, before he can wipe you clean. And how can he wipe you clean, when you hide from him? A lot is going on in my heart lately, I've dealt a lot with idolatry I can feel when I lust after earthly things that don't satisfy. Whether it be clothes, money the root of all evil, or things that I feel like I need or have to have. Like Coffee, Food, or clothes. What would it look like for me to trust that Jesus would clothed me in splendor like he does the lilies of the field? Or take care of my every need like he does the ravens of the field? For I normally trust not in God, but man and myself. I've come to realise this idolatry in my life. But my heart has turned more towards the pride of life lately.. I am so utterly prideful with my ministry, my prayers, my outreaches, my love, my life, But God confronts the church over and over again in Revelation. About them not loving their lives so much, as to shrink from death, he warns them if they do, he will not be pleased with them. He encourages them to stay strong, and not love their lives, but to be heavenly minded. To love and desire to be, and gain Christ , and not to fixate their eyes on earthly things.I know that lately their has been something stirring within me for more of this life, their is more than what I see. Their is more that my heart and soul long for. I need to see a tangible passion, revelation, reality, adventure, artistic expression, wreckless abandonement I have become drawn to these things. And seek the people and things that possess these things. I have been consumed with thoughts of a wreckless abandonment, to really give and pour my all out. To be a true hippie, but not for some bogus political conspiracy. But for the sake of knowing him, and him knowing me. Or at least thats what I think I would like to be a hippie for. See I've realised that I have a lot of pride in my life, and with pride you will naturally cling to things that you yourself can boast in. But as I covered before I'm not supposed to boast in anything but Jesus Christ. I've been clinging to other idols, and yet my heart still does not fully love Jesus. I have to have a wholehearted love for him. But I'm too busy with my own plans to grasp him, my own pride, my own ideals, and pursuit of all the attribute of God, I miss him completely. See just like it talks about in revelation he stands at the door and knocks. And I think that when we enter this time in our life, our early 20's , maybe it's more like a pre- mid life crisis. You have more authority to actually start and take off your life. The choices you make now are going to impact your whole future so you want to make the right ones. Your searching for truth, meaning, purpose, and for reality. A lot of people that have this hunger and desire for more, have been able to see past the temporary pleasures to see that their nothing but plastic worthless idols. Nothing tangible that will actually last, or that they could actually base their life off of. So we take off in our pursuit, to chose are spouse, our education, where we will live, if we'll use credit, if will buy a house, a car, if we'll get a tattoo, where our travels will lead us. We young people, our generation have a spiritual hunger and yearning for the reality of Jesus, of the God almighty. And we don't even know it. Ahh we pursue the attributes of God and we forget him. We lay hold of a ministry, a person, a truth, a church, and we think thats all there is.. and we settle. But keep pressing on beloved, you haven't even grasped it yet. We want true zeal, true passion, true realities.. but we go about pursuing these things on our own will, merit, plans and ideals. See I've realised their are two types of people in this world, people that pursue Money,greed, things, kingdoms, these are the materialistic ones.. and they can grasp so much but it never lasts long. Even the richest of rich are never satisfied or fulfilled.. but they buy into the lie. And will spend their lives on a step latter to materilistic euphoria, but little do they know they are on a step latter to hades. I still jump on that latter, then I have to check myself. Then theirs another type of people the spiritual, the hippies, the knowledge seekers, the idealist, the political, these people pursue truth and reality. And they don't care to what extreme or to what extent they have to fight for something, because they already see past the materialistic they are pursuing truth. But this in itself is a vain pursuit, see others will cling to other religions, abstract philosophies, or revert to atheism a religion in itself. And they will spend their whole lives fighting, and striving for truth. But unless they seek Jesus the one their souls longs for, the one that truly satisfies. They will never fulfill this, but on the judgement seat before Christ. They will come to an end of themselves, their truth will be nothing in the sight of the almighty. They will boast in nothing, when they stand in the presence of the one who knows all. The same thing with materialistic idolaters, they're kingdom will not carry over to the heavenly relm. And their lives will be nothing in the sight of his firey eyes, that pierces the heart. I swing more towards being the people that wants an overall truth and reality that is tangible. I am captivated by people that had this same hunger in their souls that I have. Sadly some of them never knew it was Jesus and his blood that would fulfill and lead them in a true pursuit of knowledge, and realities. I look at them with sadness, because not only did they reject the world and it's materials that don't satisfy to be lonely on their pursuit of truth. They cling to their philosphies that hold no truth or weight to themselves. What a lonely, meaningless world that must be. These people are only comended after death, but in hell no truth that gave them the peace of mind will be able to relent the wrath of the lamb on Justice Day, their relative truth simply won't matter. One interesting idealist I read up on recently, who really intrigued me was named Chris Mccandless. His heart was to leave all behind, and truly live out his favorite book the "Call of the Wild". He gave up everything , he wanted truth, reality, and peace that this materialisic life couldn't give him, and it became the end of himself.He wanted so bad to lay hold of something real and true, that he lived in the wilderness leaving his parents, family and friends. Only to die of starvation in an abandoned bus in Alaska. He might've made a lot of sense of this world, but without Jesus, he knowledge, philosphies, or zeal will mean nothing in the eyes of Christ. Christ weeps for souls that hunger to give themselves fully over to a cause, yet they reject the only true cause worth fighting for. Ghandi is also someone inspirational, he might've promoted another faucet for peace and love. But without Christ his love means nothing, it's only based on vanities. For we are the clay and he is the potter, we don't know how to love unless we go to the one our soul longs for. Nothing matters, for it is all passing away. We are like grass here today gone tommorrow. Whatever good you promoted on earth will fade away, and nothing will stand but God's word and we KNOW that he always keeps his word. So that means that our hearts are going to be utterly and fully exposed on the day of his judgement. My mind can't fathom this, everything I did for vanities sake will be like hay burned in the fire, while my pure motives will be gold refined in the fire. I'm afraid looking at my heart, and it's motives I will be like a pile of hay, with only fragments of gold dust in the midst of it all. I love going to the website last days ministry, I've become quite a fan of Kieth Green,he's one of thos e people that pursuid truth. He based his whole life on searching for reality, truth, peace, and love. He abandoned the materialistic life of hollywood and set out on a spiritual journey that he filled with drugs and philosphers of the hippie era. He settled on the teachings of Jesus, he came to the conclusion that all other religions at least recognized him to be a prophet, or respected teacher. He started to study Jesus and without his knowledge fell in love with this man. People would ask him are you a christian? And he would reply "No, I just like Jesus". Eventually his obsessive likeness of Jesus, led him to tear apart his girlfriends spiritual witch craft books. He was living with his girlfriend Melody, when he bought crosses that he liked to wear on his neck, he then gave one to Melody his girlfriend. He later told Melody it would be good for them to get married, and in a church, a chapel. Finally after Jesus had wooed his desperate eager heart over to his loving arms, Jesus fed him the word of God. And Keith radically became saved and changed, knowing the truth of God's word. He fell more in love with Jesus knowing that he would be with him one day. I think a lot of christians today, don't simply admire, like, and study Jesus. If a eager , humble sinner can recognize and pursue Jesus, why can't us Christians? Or what about A.J Jacobs this self proclaimed Agnostic set out to live life biblically for a year. He wanted something to pour out his life into, he wanted truth. He was fascinated with Religion. He did his best at obeying even the laws of Leviticus, Deuteronomy, and Judges. He wanted TRUTH, he wanted Realities, he surrendered his will but he never surrenedered his heart. He liked Gods law, and had peace and security from reading it. But he never fell in love with the author of it. For he would not let himself believe in this loving Father. He like the practicality of God, Religion, and pursuit of Truth. I think a lot of us "Christians" are like A.J Jacobs. We like how religion works, we like the hand of God, the good feelings the security, and the title but we never fell in love with Jesus.If we don't LIKE Jesus how are we going to want to spend eternity with him? He would rather spit you out of his mouth, and send you away until your serious about following him, then he would you half heartedly follow him. We deny ourselves daily, because don't trust in ourselves and our knowledge and philosophies.And we don't trust in the materials and social step ladder of this world.We deny ourselves daily because he is the only pursuit worth fighting for. He is the only one that will feed your soul, for God has set eternity in the hearts of man. No other religion has a beloved Jesus that brought you into the presence of God, being cleansed and made new through his own precious blood. Without Jesus being my goal, answer, source, and truth. I am seeking vanities, I'm seeking my own name, fame, and glory. I can boast in a lot of outward things, but what outward accomplishes can I boast in before the eyes and throne of my father? I wan to travel the world, run a marathon, preach on hippie hill and in the inner cities, I want to backpack Israel, pursue Veganism, fast for 40 days, Go sky diving, travel to Calcutta, India, own a coffee shop, live with hippies, and offer myself all and fully. But if I pour out my life just for the sake of the pride of this life.. it still means nothing without Jesus. It still means nothing in his presence, all that matter is if I had whole hearted, wreckless abandonment to him and him alone. For his Glory not my own. I am nothing but grass.. here today gone tommorrow. I have come to the conclusion over and over again, that I have to love him more. I have to be true in my love. He sees when I go to the temple for selfish ambition, and vain conceit. He sees when my ministry, or my words, flesh in them and are selfish and boastful. I had vision one day at Deliverance Bible Church, see I had been praying that I would stop filling my life, words, and actions with myself. Like I said were a bagful of flesh. We were dirt bags and he swooped down from heaven and formed us and breathed breadth into our nostrils. The Living God did this! I wanted a reality of just how fleshly I had become. I saw a vision of me talking and when I opened my mouth to speak, I saw clearly bits of flesh and dust flying out my mouth, in a sudden puff like you see in special affects on movies. It was disgusting.. bits of flesh and dust bursting out my mouth, it was gross. Thats what it looks like when activate in our flesh. I was talking to some Muslims the other day that didn't quite grasp how Jesus could be God and Man at the same time, man I don't fully grasp it either, thats how heavenly amazing it is. And how my fleshly mind can't comprehent the awesomeness of it all. But anyways, They didn't get that. See Jesus had flesh all over him, he was in his flesh all the time 24'7. But he never allowed his flesh to overtake his spirit and become fleshly. He knew who he was, he knew his calling, he knew he was the father's son. He knew he was equally yoked with God, being with God since the beginning of time. He was obedient to the holy spirit that dwelled within him. The reason we don't act like Jesus does, is because first and foremost we like our flesh too much. We enjoy activating out of it, and taking things in through it. We need to pray that Jesus would stamp eternity on our eyeballs, Johnathan Edwards did this daily. He prayed and prayed this prayer, and he then preached one of the Greastest Sermons in American History called "Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God". He preached it, and people shook, fell down, and clung to the pews. This was in the 1700's! Leanord Ravenhill was right when he said we don't truly want revival enough. Thats our problem, we like our flesh too much, and were comfortable with going without revival. We are content in our lives, and boast much in it. We hold the pride of life, beloved I am wicked to my core. I just told you how much I activate in my flesh all the time! But I am convinced that if I hold fast to God's word, and speak it over my life, I can strive, and strain, and fix my eyes on the prize ahead. To eventually lay hold of being holy as he is holy. But I have to fix my desires, I can't desire my own kingdom I have to fix them on his. I can't desire my own will, I have to set my will on his. I have to DENY,DENY,DENY. Only then can I grasp the reality , and maybe taste a little more of the reality of this man named Jesus.