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Jesus. Jesus. Jesus. precious one that I know.. beloved savior, sweet abba, the son of David! , Son of man!, do not pass me by.. without your touch I will fall into misery, without your love I'll die, I need your fragrance, I liked when you embraced me I was messed up for days after you held me.. Holy spirit rest on my soul, remove the veil. The veil of deceit, sin, selfishness, or hatred. Make me love my mom again.. do some supernatural work. Let me give into the kingdom more than I would on my own, let me pray more than I can on my own, let me love with more love that is in me, I want to decrease so that you can increase.

Jesus.. You know what has been pricking my heart lately.. You know Jesus...
Desire to give all to you, yet your quiting me down, asking me to wait, Yes Lord I will seek your face.
I will wait for your promises I will hold fast. I know that your purposes will come to past, o0o woe is me a women with unclean lips and I dwell among those with unclean lips. I desire to be yours yet I can barely lift my face towards heaven.. because I am NOTHING and you have given me mercy. I didn't just one day decide to get my act together, you supernaturally chose me, put your loving imprint on my soul and I will never be the same. I thirst, I long, I pant for this living G-d to dwell among the land of the living.. to see your agape love all around me, to breath in your zoe breadth of LIFE. I am dead to this world yet alive in Christ!

Jesus you know what's been on my heart you see all my insecurities, you see every hidden place, you see the confusion the lies of the enemy. I ask for a few things..
With all the wacky people that I've met, with all the confusion that I've seen, with all the legalism, the religiousity, the faith in a doctrine or denomination, I have your word, I have your holy spirit, I have your peace.. You see the hearts of every person and you will weigh each deed.. not just by the law but you will weigh our love and faith in obtaining the law. The law says do not committ adultery and you stepped in and said do not even lust in your heart.. Jesus gave us grace to not just do the law but to carry the same spirit that fulfills the law..
21"You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, 'Do not murder,[a] and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.' 22But I tell you that anyone who is angry with his brother[b]will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to his brother, 'Raca,[c]' is answerable to the Sanhedrin. But anyone who says, 'You fool!' will be in danger of the fire of hell.

Jesus didn't come to make things easy.. he came to make things pure. He raised the standard of the law.. the law judged the outside. Jesus took us by suprise and judged our hearts, and in that we all stand condemned. We all have fallen short of his sweet Glory with no way of obtaining it again. Yet our father in his great mercy gave us supernatural grace to have the same spirit that brings life to destroy the work of sin/death inside of us. Greater who is us than who is in this world.
Hallelujah! You are making things pure, your purifying the inside of the cup! Don't let us be white washed tombs! You see through all our religious efforts, all our masquerades, all our vain attempts and selfish conceit. You see our hearts! Oo0o we cry out for mercy and grace! You who sees every faucet of our hearts, even the faucets that are unknown to us. Holy spirit lead us in all truth show us our impurities so that we can be refined.

38"You have heard that it was said, 'Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.'[g] 39But I tell you, Do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. 40And if someone wants to sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. 41If someone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles. 42Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you.

He did the impossible he weighed the laws.. like when the pharisee saw the samaritan it would've been unlawful for him to touch something unclean especially on the sabbath. But Jesus gives this parable to say "Hey their are two conflicting laws.. should he touch what is unclean on the sabbath? Or should he love his neighbor as himself? What was the higher law beloved? He says if we love our neighbor as ourselves that all the laws are fulfilled in that law. That's what Jesus did for us, he was the law in the flesh, and all that he did was fulfilled in that commandment to love mankind more than he loved himself. To take on our sin, our shame, so that he could honor the father. He didn't do it be righteous, he didn't do it for any other reason other than his love for us. He bought us with a price!


jESUS i ASK..
Give me patience to wait on your promises, I will unceasingly Pray!
Lord Because I trust you and can't care for anything apart from you, so I don't want it if it's not you. It's you who teaches us how to love selflessly, you know if my heart is ready to die to myself once again and start a new life with another. You know who he is, you know father and our marriage will reflect your heart towards your beloved bride, your beloved life, your beloved sanctuary, your "church" we like to say.. Even though that word has lost it's meaning.

Father you know the direction my life is going to take, springs of living water wash out all that is of myself. I want to Glorify you with my life, to die is to gain!

Jesus thank you for this.. I LOVE YOU TONIGHT, LET ME LOVE YOU MORE TOMMORROW!